God-shaped hole

Empty.

Searching for more.

Unfulfilled.

Looking for answers.

Have you ever been there?  I was.  I was looking everywhere to fill that hole in my life . . . everywhere except where I needed to be looking.  The hole in my life was huge.  I had a marriage that was not falling apart, but was reduced to little more than roommate status.  My husband and I had become essentially strangers sleeping in the same bed.  I was seeking out unhealthy relationships in an attempt to fill the void.  I was turning to work to fill the void.  I could feel the hole in my life that was so dark, so deep, so pronounced that I thought I would never be able to find my way out.

And all the while the answer was waiting for me to find Him.

The moment I found Him the hole was filled . . . my God-shaped hole.

We all have a God-shaped hole, an emptiness that can only be filled by Him.  We’re all looking for a love that can only be given by Him.  Yet too often we fight it.  “I don’t need God.  I can do this all on my own.”  Right.

I thought I could do it all on my own, that I could live my life the way I wanted and be just peachy keen.  But had God not filled the hole in my life when He did I can say with almost absolute certainty that my life would have continued to spiral down.  I was already in one extra-marital relationship, and actively pursuing another.  I spent more time at work than I spent at home.  I had basically left care of my son completely to my husband.  I was completely wrapped up in myself and satisfying my own wants and desires.

But God had other plans.  He waited for me to be ready for him.  He let me try to control my own life.  And then, without me even knowing it, He started working in my life.  I could feel that change was coming.  I knew change had to happen, that things could not continue on the way they were.  Something had to give.  It turns out that was gave was me.  A friend had been praying for me, and convinced me to go to church with her the next morning.  It was a life-changing moment.  God climbed into that hole in my life and filled it so perfectly that I had no choice but to give myself to Him.  I was whole because of Him.

It’s been a lot of work to repair the damage I had done to my life.  It’s been hard, and there have been times when I’ve thought it would be easier to go back to my old life that to try to move forward, but then I think about what Jesus gave up for me . . . his life!  The changes that have come into my life since that day will never compare to what Jesus gave so that I can sit here right now and say that I had a God-shaped hole in my life and now it is filled.

Glory be to God!

“There’s a god-shaped hole in all of us
And the restless soul is searching
There’s a god-shaped hole in all of us
And it’s a void only he can fill”

Until next time . . .

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