No longer an anniversary

It’s been a while since I have posted anything.  I have been busy with work, with church, and with school.  Because of those things I have been left with little time (or energy) for writing.  Yet today, as I was scrolling though my Timehop, I saw something that I have to share.

It’s been almost a year since a very dear friendship ended.  All things eventually come to and end, including those friendships that we say will never die.  Everything has a beginning, and everything has an end.  Our end came last July.  Our beginning came 8 years ago today.  In the years leading up to today I would have remembered it, made a post on Facebook and tagged my friend.  I may have even written him a note, or bought him a goofy card.  Anniversaries are very important to me.

All my life I have seen countless relationships come and go.  I have gotten close to people and lost them.  So when someone in my life becomes someone significant I celebrate the little things, such as the day we met.

Today is no longer a celebration of the day we met eight years ago.  Today is now just another reminder of the friendship that I lost.  But honestly, had I not checked my Timehop today, this day would have passed just like any other.  That is where I am in the healing process from the loss of that friendship.  It has been a long, hard year of recovery.

A few days ago I considered reaching out to another friend, a person that was also a lost the friendship of my friend at about the same time that I did.  I wanted to ask him how he was doing, if he missed our friend, anything I could just to talk about our friend.  But I never did reach out.  I realized that I no longer missed my friend.  I miss the quality of friendship that we shared.  I miss laughing with him, talking with him.  I miss him being a part of my life.  But I have reached a point where I no longer miss him.  It has been almost a year since that friendship ended.  In that year I have changed, as I am sure that he has also.  I am not the same person that I was a year ago.  I am sure that he is not the same person he was a year ago.  I no longer know him.  How can you miss someone that you do not know.  I miss the friend that I used to know, but you can turn back time, and you can’t go back to being who you used to be.

So today is no longer a day of celebration for me.  Today is merely another day on the calendar.  Today is no longer an anniversary.  Today is back to being just June 25th.  I was blessed to call him my friend for seven years, but all things eventually reach their end.

There is a last time for everything . . .

Until next time . . .

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